Monday, January 23, 2006

My husband wants a baby

I am only 21 years old. I have only been living out of my parents house for three weeks now and married for the same length. I have not even had the chance to start with my career for a while because I am still doing my school work. But none of this matters to my husband. He understands that I want to make some money first, and we both would like to get a house before we have kids, but that does not stop him from wanting a baby right now.

I get asked everday by Ian, "can we have a baby?". And everyday I answer, "NO!". Then he says, "I can't believe my wife doesn't want to have a baby and I do." GRRRRRRR!!!! It makes me so angry. He knows that I want kids, and he knows that we can't have them now.

Our nephew Hunter really doesn't help at all. Ian and I watch him from time to time (actually I'm babysitting as we speak, he is sleeping). This just makes Ian want a baby even more because Hunter is just the most adorable kid. BUT I JUST CAN'T GET PREGNANT NOW!!!!

So, if the mood strikes, please talk some sense into my baby crazed husband, because anything I say just gets ignored.

73 comments:

Elizabeth said...

Ian,
you may want a baby now, but once you have it.. YOU CAN'T GIVE IT BACK!!!! Feel free to borrow Hunter whenever you like, because we love him to bits and love that you want to borrow him. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOUR TIME AS A YOUNG MARRIED COUPLE! go on adventures. Make a list of things that you want to do before you have kids, and DO IT!!! Figure out who you are in your marriage, before bringing lives into the world, God willing, there will be plenty of time for that...
Love you guys, and love that you love our kid (and kids in general).
HAVE SAFE SEX!!
love, Elizabeth

Anonymous said...

Ian,

Listen to your Sister-in-Law!!!

Anonymous said...

Ian, Ian, Ian!!! You can't expect to have a sugar momma if she can't finish her schooling. It's very important because it's a great career and she needs to finish it. Babies come and stay with you for 18 to 23 years so you've got lots of time. My daughter is very smart and knows what she's talking about. Have fun trying though! Love your mother-in-law.

D said...

Someone needs to stick up for Ian. It shall be me. I'm 25, my second daughter is one and a half and I'm done. Yay! The kids make life more joyful and meaningful. I've got a family now and I feel like I can move on with my life. We'll still be young when they move out. You know what that means? Travel. Lots of Travel. Go Ian!

Anonymous said...

I don't mean to burst the we'll travel when we're older bubble but....my parents had their family at quite a young age and have had the freedom of adult children since they were 50. They are incredibly young, healthy and in a more than comfortable financial state but unlike the young they still have many responsibilities and worries including their fully grown capable children. Children are forever as is the worry and guilt that I assume goes along with being a good parent. Enjoy the freedom of being young, married and in love because I know that even though you may have the time and money to travel and experience new things when you're older nothing can compare to the freedom of those experiences when you're young! Listen to you're incredibly young and intelligent wife!

Christy and Dustin said...

WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Trust me! We were preggers with Ben six months after we were married. If ONLY we could go back to the days of sleeping in and going to movies twice a week. Yes, have kids and have them young but WAIT! THere's no going back. I'd have waited three years if I could have. But, I wouldn't trade them in for that time. Enjoy, your delightful newly married, childless bliss. Trust me.
I know this advice is unsolicited so sorry. Hope I didn't step on any toes.
BTW congratulations on getting married!!!!!
In case you're wondering this is Dustin Heigh's wife Christy. I'm doing some Blog snooping.

Anonymous said...

IaN.
Will you listen to any of these? DOn't have kids now. PLenty of time later, even though you might not think so now. You have a big job ahead of you right now. Getting to really know your wife. Kids don't make this any easier. Get a good career going, get a few shekels ahead, get a little more growed up yourself.
Tom

None of your Business said...

If he really wants a baby, maybe the two of you can make a school-financial plan that, perhaps in a year if you both still want the baby you can afford it as well!

Best of Luck,

Andra-Jane

Anonymous said...

It sounds like you want kids, just not now. So Ian, when she is telling you no, what she is really saying is yes, but not right now. You will get your baby boy or baby girl that you both want so much, it's just not right now. So just remember, when she is telling you no, it's not never, it's just not right now. :)

Also another thing to keep in mind is you should be off birth control for 3 months before trying for kids. That way all the hormones can work their way out of your system. So make sure when you are ready that you stay off the pill for 3 months before you really try. Also during those 3 months you should start taking pre-natals to get your body ready for motherhood. Babies strip alot of nutrients if you don't have a good stockpile for them. Which takes from your bones and teeth. I hear a lot of women say they never went to a dentist before they had kids. Plus they give you great hair and nails! The only drawback is they are super strong and can make you nautious. Just take them with some carbs and you'll be fine.

I hope this helps. My husband and I have been married for 14 years, and no kids yet. We got married young so we are still not too old for kids yet. And while we still may one day have kids, I still think waiting until the time is right is best. We've had so many great experiences together that we can share with kids if we ever have them. And we are in a much better situation now to give them the life they deserve.

Yes, it's completely different when you take in Hunter from time to time and when you have them all day. When your little one is sick and up until 2am it's not like you can say it's your turn this time. You are both up at 2am with a screaming child. When the scary monster is in the closet at 3am, you both are up with a screaming child that wants mommy and daddy. And you still have to be to work the next day on like no sleep. And weekends? Well now they want you even more, they still get up early on Saturday and Sunday. Kids don't have a sleep in on the weekends mode. Also they say once you are a parent you always worry, even in your sleep so even if you do get a full nights rest, it's not the same as before kids. You are still anticipating something might happen even on night where nothing does.

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